Racing short: Don’t. Give. Up.

Over the last 4 weeks, I’ve raced three 5km races in pursuit of breaking the elusive 19 minute barrier. It took me three full races to perform my best. This is a collection, written at different times along the way.  Some of this is from dialogue with my coach.

Race #1: Blue Nose 5km, May 14.

This one was all about having fun and shaking off marathon training and getting back in the short game. My orders were to run it without a watch so I did so. It was 26 degrees and gorgeously sunny: more beach weather at 3pm race time. I had lots of fun after 20:15 of racing.  Two high school athletes who I coach with high school track and field were racing too. It was fun to see them at the finish line. Two of my club mates  were racing, good laughs with them. A good beginning.

June 7. Post Penguin Run 5km Road Race

My danger zone in a 5km race is between km 3 and km 4.  Once you hit the 4km marker, there’s 1000m to go and it’s possible to campaign legs and body to hammer it home. I have learned that within km 3 to 4, Evil Voice is waiting on the roadside to seduce me into letting up a little and giving up my goal. It’s consistent in it’s attack: it always tells me that it’s already gone.

The thing is, it’s not gone at all. It feels like it’s gone because it’s so very hard. In a 5km race, the is reality: it feels so very hard because it IS SO VERY HARD. It’s not gone. My goal is never gone.  It’s just hard.

At PEI race weekend in October 2015, I thought that my sub-40 goal was way gone between 8 and 9km. It was not way gone. I finished at 40:10. But I think that I let up a bit and gave it up between 8 and 9km.

At Penguin Run on June 4, Evil Voice wanted me to give up between 3 and 4. Despite hanging onto my coach, Lee McCarron, who was pacing me for the race, I had a moment where I thought it was all over. I believed that my goal was blown. It wasn’t. I PB’ed at 19:05. That’s awesome and deserves celebration. And… it is an agonizing 6 second off my sub-19 goal.

Here’s the break down of the Penguin 5km. I had to really think about this recap. As soon as the race ended, it was a blur. A teammate asked me what Lee, our coach, was saying out there. I had no idea: “Run faster?” I guessed.

Km 1:  Find Lee, lucky me. Line up. Spot and smile at sister.  Gun. Getting out felt good. Three of us girls were on our coach’s “train” aiming for sub-19.  The first 600m actually felt like we were running slow though I knew and trusted that Lee would have us precisely on pace. I determine that I probably always go out too fast for the first km.

km 2: By 1500m, my arms felt heavy. I able to just receive that thought and let it go as a thought with no value. If they were heavy, they were heavy, we still had a race to run so run the race was the only option. For most of this km, I was singing this silly pop song in my head and just running. It was so helpful to have Lee pacing me: I could just zone out. I only had to think about running off his shoulder and I guess now singing. I don’t even listen to pop but my kids love this song as it played at Blue Nose kids run. I told the song to go away but it wouldn’t so I just let it be. It was keeping my head empty and legs just running.

km 3: Turnaround pylon @ halfway. Fail. Whatever, can’t nail it all. I knew approaching it that the runner ahead of us was in a bad spot for our group of now 3 and I feel like I almost came to a stop around it.

km 4: Very hard. This is where it was most helpful to be running with Lee. 5km always brings “5km-fear”: fear of blowing up and exponentially increasing the suffer-fest. I wasn’t thinking about much here but sticking to my coach/pacer and instead of 5km-fear, I felt safe. That’s probably a weird way to put it as there’s nothing dangerous about a race but it just felt safe to continue at this pace even when the effort was becoming so. much. more. My rationale brain was telling me that Lee was in charge and we trust him so just keep it dialed in through the hurt. It hurt bad. There was still a glimmer of, “did I blow it? I can’t do it.”

This is often the point where I usually let myself give up a little because I already have a good place in the women’s field and Evil Voice  says that that’s good enough for today.  At least I didn’t do that.

km5: Trying give it all I’ve got, especially when Lee said 30 seconds to go. With the week that just happened, all I had was a 3:55 split for this last km and that can be ok. Nothing felt bad in a bad way, I was just overall toast.  I wasn’t sure what we were going to be. Morgan had pulled ahead. I knew I fell off some. 19:05 is good for today. A PB is a PB and that was 3 years and a child in the making. I believe that my previous PB of 19:09 at the 2013 Lung Run was on a short course.

My primary goal is to never believe that it’s blown at Lunenburg. I commit to not give up.

June 13: Post-Lunenburg 5km Road Race and Muffin Festival

Garmin GPS data: 19:01.79 over a total distance of 5.09km

Splits: 3:46, 3:40, 3:51, 3:44, 3:43, 0:17

The rundown:

km1: Had a little song to sing and was in a really positive place

km2: I really liked this course and this was my favorite part along the water though it was super windy. Teammate Morgan and I were really lucky to be able to tuck in behind Lee and Matthias here and I was pretty much loving life and running here and feeling really strong.

km3: hello hill around the corner, you weren’t as bad as I thought you would be. Exciting to see the next girl coming back to us now.  Song gone, head empty, still in really good head space and just all in on believing that I got this.  I call 3:51 for the split that included up that hill good for me.

km4: blur, I don’t know, it was good. I was working hard but still in it

km5+: Have next girl, don’t have next girl. Not thinking about time anymore, just staying on and mentally, still in it and feeling like I had it.  Coach Lee’s commentary about getting next girl really kept me in it.  I could read some anxiety coming from Lee that we were too close. It didn’t feel like so much of a fade, just no kick available. No extra seconds available.

Approach and cross line as clock ticks 18:58, 59, 19:00, 19:01.

I go back and think about where those extra seconds were.  But all I can think of is that this was well executed and there just were no extra seconds.

I am happy with this.  I take this 19:02 and my running muffin shirt and call it taking care of business.

Here’s what I’m happy about with the Muffin Run: