This is a collection of race thoughts from the Scotiabank Montreal 21k race weekend, my goal spring race.
Pre-race, Saturday, April 22, 2017:
I know that I’m going into this race the fittest and fastest I’ve ever been. This winter, I put together a really solid training cycle with the “Big Boys.” No matter the outcome of Montreal, I’m proud of myself for making it up to this pace group with the Halifax Road Hammers. I made it up to the boys.
At my last Road Hammer’s practice before Montreal, pace partner David M paid me one of the nicest compliments possible, though probably unknowingly. We train at Point Pleasant and I ran to the bathroom before the workout started. There are 2 bathrooms at the park, labeled male and female. The girl’s bathroom was occupied so I went into the boy’s. Someone was banging on the door and when I opened it afterwards, it was David: “oh it’s you,” I say.
“Hey, hey, hey!” says David, never one to pass on a joke or a chirp, “You may run like you’re one of the boys. But that doesn’t mean you get this bathroom, it is still just for us!”
In the weeks before the Montreal 21km, a few friends asked me how I’ve made this jump in fitness and how did I get to the boys? There’s no secret or magical recipe. I made it here the same way we all would:
- Hard work
- Consistency: alarm at 5am three days/week regardless of rain, snow, ice or calm plus two Road Hammer’s practices per week plus non-optional core and strength work
- Enjoying the process and all the training fun, jokes, chirps and miles with friends
- The guidance of a skilled coach and a fast and reliable pace group to work with.
I’m flying to Montreal with Road Hammers/friends Lee and Mike J now. I’m feeling ready, confident and prepared. Again, no matter the outcome tomorrow, I put together an amazing training cycle and I’ve enjoyed the process and those things matter as much as 84-86 minutes on race day.
I’m going into this race in a new way, one that I’ve learned this winter while running with the Big Boys. Traditionally, I’ve lined up for a race eager to nail my time goal and also ready to enjoy the race and the city and everything that the racecourse and city will have to offer me. These Big Boys line up differently. They line up with the singular thought of: “How fast can I possibly run this course today?” There’s no thought given to “enjoying” the race. They will enjoy the city after they crush the course the best they can. So this will be me tomorrow: “how fast can I possibly run this course today.” I will see the racecourse and the city after.
I’ve written before that my race goals are:
- No pretty race photos.
- No memories with which to write a race recap blog. Tonya and I tried to tell Lee that he’s responsible for the race recap blog but he’s not been very responsive to this order. It appears that the Boss doesn’t take orders.
- Dig deep and grind/suffer
And now I will add lining up with the singular thought: “How fast can I possibly run this course today.” I would also love to place in the top 10 women.
Coach Lee has decided to pace me for this race. When Mike and Lee and I signed up in January, we were all planning to race and also enjoy a fun vacation weekend away. But then Lee had the opportunity to go to NYC with Eric Gillis and race the NYC Half Marathon in March so he says that he’s already done his spring race and now wants to be on pace duty.
Lee informed me at the airport that I would be running the race without a watch. “Oh shit,” is my first thought.
He says that he has two questions for me: “How much do you trust me and how big of a risk are you willing to take?” The answer to both of those questions is: all the way.
Typically, I use my watch to reign in my pace early. Then late, I will use it to confirm that I’m still on pace when it feels so tremendously hard and feels like I’ve blown it. But I believe that when I confirm I am still on pace, I probably let up a little after that confirmation. Instead, I get to just hang onto Lee: #lucky.
I’m ready to take care of my racing job at this race. I’m ready to dig deep and suffer for it. I dove into learning how to do that this winter. Traditionally, I’ve always been the boss of my pace group. I take care of setting and maintaining the pace and reigning in the group and taking care of the group. With the Big Boys this winter, this wasn’t the case. I was never the Boss; I have been tucked in back, trying desperately not to get dropped. I was no longer concerned about anyone but myself and hanging on.
Through this, I have learned to focus more. To match the pace instead of set the pace no matter how fast the pace looks on paper (hello 7 x 1km @ 3:47/km or 40 x 1 minute at 3:47/km). To hang on through the end of each interval without watching the numbers on my Garmin countdown the interval. To focus on one thing up ahead, a road sign or Mike’s shoulder, and run hard with an empty mind until the Garmin beeps: that’s taking care of business.
I’ve visualized the race and I’m ready for the pain. I’m prepared to even enter the Pain Cave- all the way from California and Stephen Kiyoi. Pain is fuel. Pain will not blow me up.
All of this has prepared me to line up with Lee tomorrow, no watch, and take care of my racing job. I don’t need the watch. I have all of this.
The last factor for the race tomorrow is Darren Schives. We lost our friend and running brother Darren yesterday after a fast and courageous battle with cancer at the young and fit age of 57. The sharpies are packed to write his name on our bibs.
Darren loved the running community and he loved training and he loved race weekends. I will run with that love in my heart.
We will hammer out a fast one for our running brother Darren tomorrow.
The Race (written on Monday, April 24):
1:26:12. 7TH female overall. 1st in Age Group
That’s what she wrote.
I didn’t have a hard time goal. The goal was the run as hard and as fast as possible. I wanted to place in the top 10 females in this Montreal field of 1032 women.
I ran as fast and as hard as possible. I don’t have much to tell you about the actual race because I was running as hard and as possible. And I did that for 19km. And then the wheels fell off.
Coach Lee had this to say: “You ran the best 19km I’ve seen in a long time. And then the worst 2km I‘ve seen in a long time.”
I don’t really have an explanation. I was in it and then my body turned to quicksand and I wanted it so badly but the quicksand. At 19km, there were pylons to keep you on course and Lee was running next to me and I supposed to be following and then my body went to veer through the pylon off course. I was getting foggy and confused. I knew I was in trouble.
But I ran really well for 19km. Here are the very few thoughts that I recall.
Warm up was fun and relaxed. It was a beautiful calm day. The weather looked like it would be pretty perfect. Lee asked me the night before if I wanted to know the race plan and I answered, “Do you want me to know the details of the race plan?” `And he said no. I trust Lee and I’ve run many of his race plans so I know what to expect and that’s all I needed.
Lee and I lined up in the first corral. I wanted to place us about 10 women back. Men were trying to stand on top of me. No one wanted to be behind a girl? That was weird. “Sure, dude, I’ll see you at the finish” I think.
The first maybe 5-6km were so easy and smooth. If Lee told me once, he told me 15 times to relax and reign the pace in. I loved not having a watch on. My only duty was to run match his stride and that’s all I did. I can’t tell you what the course looked like. I don’t know.
From 6 to 8km, the race got onto a loose gravel trail. There was mud. I hate loose gravel trails with mud. I was worried- how Jesus long is this trail going to last. I was worried but not panicked, it’s ok to be working harder on the gravel, surely it will end and I’ll get it back. That’s the first thing I said to Lee. “I don’t like this. Where does it end?” Lee probably made up an answer but delivered it with authority so I believed it. One sentence spoken in 8km: for those of you who run with me, you know that’s a big deal! No chatter goal achieved.
When we got off the trail, we started long and out and back on not-trail and Lee picked out Mike across the Olympic Basin. Hi Mikey: work hard too.
Now there’s not much else to report. A runner around us was singing and another guy said “What the fuck?!” I didn’t know at the time but we went through 10km in 40:07. Two years ago, my goal race with Lee was PEI 10km and I raced that in 40:10.
We saw Mike one more time and he yelled a funny weekend joke and my feet were lighter for a moment.
I asked Lee a few times, “Are we ok?” and he would say yes.
Looking at our splits, we were very much ok.
I thought a lot about Darren but not about much else other than running off Lee’s shoulder.
Somewhere around 16km, it was time to get competitive. I was still on. I started trying to reel the next women in. I catch “her.” But “she” is a long-haired dude wearing capris. No other woman in sight.
Somewhere beyond 16km, the pain flooded me and I greeted it with Nick McBride’s greeting, “Hello pain, I’ve been expecting you.” But not today. Pain is fuel. I stayed on and I was excited because I knew that I was staying on.
My km splits from 14-19km were this:
14km: 3:59
15km: 4:05
16km: 4:06
17km: 4:03
18km: 4:00
19km: 4:02
And then I was cooked at 20km. My last two kms were 4:08 and then 4:20. I didn’t give up. I didn’t blow it. I went to for it and I got thoroughly gassed. It was worth the risk.
I had my longest ever session of fence-hanging while the confusion and dizziness cleared at the finish line. Lee and Mike say they are happy to see me a mess at the finish line- that was the big effort I wanted to do. We saw teammate Kayte and thanked her for the cheers even though I didn’t see her on the course.
We ran long: 21.27km. So did Mike. We ran the best tangents we could. The course wasn’t certified. Maybe it was long. Regardless, I ran faster longer than I ever have. 4:03/km pace overall. With the long course, Lee says we could call this a 1:25:30. I like that.
I’m proud of what I pulled off. Racing is hard. My first place age group medal is very shiny. Celebrating was fun.
1:26:12 is all she wrote.
